What Makes People Hard To Love?
What makes people hard to love is simply this: people are human.
Prefer to watch? The Struggle To LOVE
GALATIANS 9: 19-21
The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions… (These things make love difficult.)
People are hard to love when their actions clash with our expectations or desires.
We naturally love those who are kind to us, but when someone is indifferent, it feels unnatural to extend love. 😑
And then there’s the deeper layer—sometimes people are hard to love because they remind us of something in ourselves we don’t want to face. Our own impatience, pride, or wounds. 💔
Is Anybody Easy To Love?
The flesh is wired to love all things pretty, glittery, soft, cool, etc
But is this really love? 🤔
When we are asked, ‘Why do u love person A? ’, the immediate answer is to gush all about their good traits or even the bad ones that we find pleasant, like the way they act when angry ( red noses, blablabla ).
LUKE 6
32 “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. 33 And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that.
So it’s not about who is easy to love. Love should be constant, like our Father’s. 🤍
Do we know what love is?
Naturally, no, we don’t, we have no idea.
Our fallen nature gravitates towards what pleases us and rejects what is difficult
And what we call love is that pleasure we get. 🙁
We love food, we love that kind neighbour, we love that guy who stood up for the other in the street, even though he was physically smaller …
This is not … love
Gal 5
10 I am confident in the Lord that you will take no other view.
So what is God’s view of love, the love we are called to have? ❔
1 CORINTHIANS 13: 4 – 8
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails.
How to love?
To learn how to love:
Let us look at how God loved and continues to love us. 💗
God the Father
- He Loved Us First ❤
1 John 4:19 –
“We love Him, because He first loved us.”
- He Loved Us While We Were Still Sinful ❤
So, someone being nasty is not an excuse not to love them
Romans 5:8 –
“But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.”
- He Loved Us Enough to Give His Son ❤
Love is giving, and God gave His very best.
- He Loves us Unconditionally ❤
Love is independent of the person or circumstance
Romans 8:38-39 –
“…Neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come… shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
God’s love is self-initiated, sacrificial, unshakable, etc
It goes beyond feelings—it’s a commitment that He never breaks.
God the Son
Christ loved us even though He knew we would crucify Him…
- He Loved with Compassion ❤
Jesus didn’t just feel love—He acted on it. He healed the sick, fed the hungry, and comforted the broken. His love wasn’t passive; it moved Him to care for the hurting.
- He Loved by Serving ❤
John 13:14-15
The King of Kings washed the dirty ( and probably smelly ) feet of His disciples. 😶
Love humbles itself and serves, no matter how high the position.
- He Loved by Speaking the Truth, Even When It Hurt ❤
John 8:10-11 –
“Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.”
Jesus loved deeply, but He never ignored sin. His love was honest. He forgave the woman caught in adultery, but also called her to leave her sin.
- He Loved Sacrificially ❤
His ultimate act of love was dying for us. Not because we deserved it, but because He chose to love us.
- He Loved Even His Enemies ❤
Luke 23:34 –
“Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.”
While being crucified, He prayed for those who mocked and killed Him.
(P.S. Even those who spat on Him, yes, spat )
That’s love beyond human capability. 😌
Many acts of kindness have an underlying motivation—feeling good, receiving praise, or easing guilt.
Jesus’ love was purely for our sake, not His own
He didn’t gain anything from dying for us—He gave everything.
Why should we love others?
Love is God’s Signature in Us
John 13:35 –
“By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.”
The evidence of God in our lives isn’t miracles or knowledge—it’s love.
If God forgives our sins, we must extend that same love and grace to others.
If you love, you naturally obey all of God’s commands—you won’t steal, lie, or harm others. Without love, all other gifts are uselesssss
Conclusion
Love is not about who is deserving, but about who we become when we choose to love. – The image of God
In true love, there are no difficult people – only people to love
So let us love not by preference but by conviction, not by fleeting emotion but by commitment, and not as the world loves, but as our Father loves—mercifully, endlessly, unconditionally and unashamedly. ✨